


SET MY HEART ON FIRE.

by tyjo_exe



Category: Bandom, Fall Out Boy, My Chemical Romance, Panic! at the Disco, Twenty One Pilots
Genre: Alternate Universe - College/University, Brendon is so damn bitter, Eventual Brallon, F/F, F/M, History of Japan references, M/M, Pete hates his philosophy class, Texting, Yuri!!! on Ice References, idk where this is going but it will hopefully be decent, josh dun is smitten, more characters will be added, multiple bandom references, the over done group chat fic, this is mostly joshler, tyler is a Good Christian, tyler is not heterosexual
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2017-04-20
Updated: 2018-01-24
Packaged: 2018-10-21 04:32:07
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 20
Words: 7,196
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/10677744
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/tyjo_exe/pseuds/tyjo_exe
Summary: long story short, they're all fucked.





	1. like a jackass.

**Author's Note:**

  * For [floralrapture](https://archiveofourown.org/users/floralrapture/gifts).



> this is trash i am so sorry.

         _Forehead has started a group chat!_

 

Forehead added...

         _ryro, gee, frnk,, skelly boi, eyeliner, and stump_

 

         _Forehead has changed the group chat to "HELP."_

**12:35 PM**

 

         _ryro is typing..._

_Forehead is typing..._

 

 **ryro:** what kind of fresh hell is this

 

 **Forehead:** H E L P

 

 **eyeliner:** did your mom catch you jacking off

 

 **Forehead:** what

 

 **eyeliner:** what

 

 **frnk:** do...... do you have experience with that, pete

 

 **eyeliner:** no

 

 **stump:** yes he does

 

 **eyeliner:** stfu patty

 

 **gee:** pA TT Y,

 

 **ryro:** P A T T Y

 

         _stump has changed their name to patty_

 

 **patty:** fuck you

 

 **Forehead:** GUYS THIS IS SERIOUS

 

 **frnk:** jfc then stop being a drama queen and just tell us

 

 **gee:** scuse u

 

 **gee:** i'm the drama queen

 

 **ryro:** oh my GOD

 

 **gee:** shut your whore mouth, george

 

 **skelly boi:** OOOOOHHHHHHH

 

 **eyeliner:** jfc when did you get here tyler

 

 **skelly boi:** what does jfc mean

 

 **ryro:** uh oh

 

 **gee:** jesus fucking christ

 

 **skelly boi:** chEESE AND RICE GERALD YOU CAN'T SAY THAT

 

 **frnk:** g. E R AL D

 

_gee has changed their name to gerald_

**Forehead:** i hate all of you.

 

 **ryro:** okay sorry just tell us we’ll stop

 

 **Forehead:** THANK U GEORGIE

 

            _ryro has left the group chat_

 

 **skelly boi:** uhm

 

            _Forehead added ryro to the group chat!_

 

 **Forehead:** bitch u thought

 

 **ryro:** what did i ever do to deserve this

 

 **Forehead:** ANYWAYS AS I WAS TRYING TO SAY

 

 **Forehead:** i just showed up to my spanish final

 

 **Forehead:** without a pencil

 

 **Forehead:** like a jackass

 

 **frnk:** brendon if you gathered us all here just so one of us would bring you a pencil i swear to fucking god

 

 **skelly boi:** DON’T SAY THE LORD’S NAME IS VAIN, FRANK ANTHONY IERO JR.

 **Forehead:** gUYS PLS I NEED A PENCIL

 

 **skelly boi:** isn’t that cute guy with the pink hair in your class why don’t you ask him

 

 **skelly boi:** I MEAN HE’S NOT CUTE WHAT SORRY IM HETEROSEXUAL

 

 **Forehead:** did u just

 

            _skelly boi has left the group chat_

 

 **Forehead:** when will u peOPLE LEARN

 

            _Forehead has added skelly boi to the group chat!_

 

 **Forehead:** there is no escape from hell

 

 **skelly boi:** im gonna kms

 

 **ryro:** isn’t that a sin

 

 **skelly boi:** shUT THE HECK UP GEORGE

 

 **skelly boi:** ask pinky for a pencil

 

 **Forehead:** his name is josh

 

 **skelly boi:** ok?

 

 **Forehead:** he has a tattoo on his arm

 

 **gerald:** ooOOOOOOOOO

 

 **skelly boi:** kys gerald

 

 **gerald:** i aim to please

 

 **Forehead:** josh gave me a pencil god is real

 

 **skelly boi:** only took you eighteen years to figure that out

 

 **Forehead:** BOI IF YOU DONT STFU

 

 **patty:** brendon dont you have a final to take

 

 **Forehead:** oops

 

 **eyeliner:** good luck, beebo

 

 **Forehead:** wtf is a beebo

 

 **eyeliner:** you

 **Forehead:** kys pete


	2. 420 blaze it.

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> THIS IS NOT WHAT I HAD PLANNED THIS IS NOT WHAT I HAD PLANNED.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> this is short but # blaze it.

**4:20 AM**

            _Forehead is typing…_

 

 

 **Forehead:** 420 BLAZE IT

 

 **ryro:** have you ever been stoned in your entire life

 

 **Forehead:** F O U R T W E N T Y B L A Z E I T

 

 **skelly boi:** are you smoking the devil’s grass

 

 **Forehead:** yes

 

 **skelly boi:** oh

 

 **Forehead:** …….

 

 **skelly boi:** …….

 

 **ryro:** wth

 

 **Forehead:** tyler

 

 **skelly boi:** omw

 

 **ryro:** WHA T THE FUCK

 

 **ryro:** WHY AM I THE ONE FREAKING OUT ABOUT THIS

 

 **ryro:** GUYS

**ryro:** ANYONE

 

 **ryro:** PATRICK

 

 **patty:** what happened

 

 **ryro:** READ THE PAST MESSAGES

 

 **patty:**  T YL E R ROB E R T JSO EP H

 

 **gerald:** omgee

 

 **skelly boi:** lol

 

 **patty:** YOU HAVE CLASS IN FOUR HOURS

 

 **skelly boi:** josh smokes pot

 

 **patty:** aRE YOU DOING THIS TO IMPRESS A BOY

 

 **skelly boi:** no patty that’s gay

 

 **gerald:** ur pretty gay

 

 **skelly boi:** shuddup mom

 

 **gerald:** did you just

 

 **gerald:** did you just call me mom

 

 **skelly boi:** lmao

 

 **gerald:** im omw to make sure you dont do anything stupid

 

 **skelly boi:** UGH MOM

 

 **frnk:** im coming, too

 

 **patty:** GUYS GO TO BED

 

 **ryro:** jfc i’ll pick you up, frank

 

 **patty:** guys,,,,

 

 **eyeliner:** don’t have fun without me  >:(

 

 **patty:** PETE

 

 **eyeliner:** do you want me to pick you up

 

 **patty:** NO WHAT THE HELL

 

 **eyeliner:** your loss

 

 **patty:** YOU GUYS

 

 **patty** : GUYS

 

 **patty:** HELLO

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> im so sorry god.
> 
> my tumblr is tyjo-exe and my twitter is @GOLNGTOOFAST. hmu. leave a comment. aye.


	3. # tyler has a girlfriend

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> girl, bye.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> two updates in one day ??? what is life.  
> anyways i update this to keep myself from wanting to die in philosophy.

**2:07 PM**

**patty:** i just finished picking classes for next semester i am #blessed

 

 **skelly boi:** how are you picking classes right now ?????

 

 **skelly boi:** freshman arent allowed to pick classes until next week ?????

 

 **patty:** im a notetaker for a girl in my psychology class so they let me pick classes with the seniors

 

 **gerald:** i need to get in on that wtf

 

 **frnk:** babe ur handwriting is actual chicken scratch

 

 **gerald:** o yeah

 

 **Forehead:** tylie

 

 **skelly boi:** what

 

 **Forehead:** who’s the girl you’re talking to in your bio class

 

 **skelly boi:** what the frick where are you even ??

 

 **Forehead:** look out the window, bitch

 

 **skelly boi:** HE’S STARING ME THROUGH THE WINDOW FROM THE BUILDING ACROSS FROM ME WHAT THE FRICK

 

 **patty:** brendon that’s so weird ????

 

 **Forehead:** who’s the girl, tylie ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)

 

 **skelly boi:** oh my GOSH no one she’s just a girl

 

 **Forehead:** TYLER HAS A GIRLFRIEND

 

 **skelly boi:** what

 

 **eyeliner:** TYLER HAS A GIRLFRIEND

 

 **gerald:** T YL ER HA S A  GIRL FIREN D

 

 **skelly boi:** stfu

 

 **frnk:** what happened to josh tho

 

 **skelly boi:** waht abt him ???

 

 **frnk:** don't you like him ???

 

 **skelly boi:** ok one) idek his last name two) no that's gay

 

 **frnk:** one) his last name is dun two) aren't you gay?

 

 **skelly boi:** im not gay ??

 

 **frnk:** you sure?

 

 **skelly boi** : ya

 

 **frnk:** k

 

 **Forehead:** BUT WHO'S THE GIRL

 

 **skelly boi:** her name is jenna

 

 **Forehead:** tyler and jenna

 

 **ryro:** oh my god

 

 **skelly boi:** why

 

 **Forehead:** sittin' in a tree

 

 **eyeliner:** F U C K I N G

 

 **skelly boi:** THAT'S UNHOLY

 

 **eyeliner:** BOY YOU SMOKED THE DEVIL'S LETTUCE OR WHATEVER THE FUCK YOU CALLED IT EARLIER THAT'S UNHOLY

 

 **skelly boi:** o true

 

 **Forehead:** the devil's lettuce

 

 **gerald:** tat's what i'm going to call it for now on

 

 **skelly boi:** tat

 

 **gerald:** suck a cock

 

 **skelly boi:** that's gay

 

 **gerald:** nfjkdfgdjkfngdsal

 

 **eyeliner:** i s2g

 

 **patty:** how did that go.

 

 **eyeliner:** are you still mad

 

 **patty:** no.

 

 **eyeliner:** tylie professed his love for josh while he was high

 

 **skelly boi:** that's a lie

 

 **gerald:** no it's not

 

 **skelly boi:** heck off, gerald

 

 **skelly boi:** also brendon are you just gonna. keep staring at me from the window.

 

 **Forehead:** yah

 

 **skelly boi:** girl bye

 

 **Forehead:** Excuse You.

 

 **patty:** what just happened

 

 **Forehead:** he just closed the blinds to the classroom like a JERK.

 

 **skelly boi:** you were scaring the children, beebo

 

 **Forehead:** what children

 

 **skelly boi:** me

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> my tumblr is tyjo-exe and my twitter is @GOLNGTOOFAST. hmu. leave a comment. aye.


	4. can you feel my heart beat

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> they watched yuuri!!! on ice and everything is hell  
> joshie also finally shows up god is real.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> probably no update over the weekend i am a busy bean  
> i'd like to take this moment to apologize to god

**8:35 PM**

**** _gerald is typing…_

 

 **gerald:** can you feel

 

 **patty:** oh no

 

 **Forehead:** my heart beat

 

 **patty:** NO NOT YOU TOO

 

 **gerald:** tired of feeling never enough

 

 **patty:** hELP

 

 **Forehead:** i close my eyes and tell myseld that my dreams will come true

 

 **gerald:** there’ll be no more darkness when you believe in yourself; you are unstoppable

 

 **Forehead:** where your destiny lies, dancing on the blades yoU SET MY HEART ON FIRE

 

 **gerald:** DONT STOP US NOW

 

 **Forehead:** THE MOMENT OF TRUTH

 

 **gerald:** WE WERE BORN TO MAKE HISTROY

 

 **Forehead:** WE'LL MAKE IT HAPPEN

 

 **gerald:** WE'LL TURN IT AROUND

 

 **Forehead:** YES WE WERE BORN TO MAKE HISTORY

 

 **skelly boi:** what the frick just happened

 

 **eyeliner:** art

 

 **ryro:** you guys it's not even ten pm yet why are you like this

 

 **Forehead:** BORN TO MAKE HISTORY!!!!!!

 

 **frnk:** brendon

 

 **Forehead:** yah

 

 **frnk:** i hope you die

 

 **Forehead:** i didnt even start it wtf ur bf did

 

 **frnk:** yeah but i'd be a horrible bf if i told him i wanted him to die

 

 **gerald:** thx

 

 **skelly boi:** im so confused

 

 **ryro:** im in my chem lab everyone go away

 

 **patty:** ^

 

 **eyeliner:** no keep going this is getting me through philosophy

 

 **Forehead:** according to all known laws of aviation,

 

 

_skelly boi has left the chat._

_patty has left the chat._

 

 **Forehead:** smh

 

_Forehead has added patty, and skelly boi to the group chat!_

 

 **Forehead:** WHAT DID I SAY

 

 **Forehead:** THERE IS NO ESCAPE

 

 **ryro:** brendon can u make us all admins

 

 **Forehead:** what why

 

 **ryro:** pls

 

 **Forehead:** sure???

 

_Forehead has promoted ryro, gerald, frnk, eyeliner, patty, and skelly boi to admins!_

 

 **ryro:** thx beebo

 

_ryro has kicked Forehead out of the groupchat_

 

 **frnk:** thank the lord

 

 **ryro:** just doing my job

 

_skelly boi has added Forehead to the groupchat!_

 

 **skelly boi:** sorry i felt bad

 

 **ryro:** fuck off, tylier

 

 **skelly boi:** tylier

 

_skelly boi has changed their name to tylier!_

 

 **Forehead:** IM BACK, FUCKERS

 

 **Forehead:** I CNA T BELIEBE YOU WOULD DO THIS TO ME

 

 **Forehead:** MY OWN CHAT. MY OWN CHILD.

 

 **frnk:** stfu

 

 **eyeliner:** anyways

 

 **eyeliner:** im in philosophy someone save my

 

 **tylier:** i'll save your heavy dirty soul

 

 **eyeliner:** what

 

 **tylier:** what

 

 **eyeliner:** i wanna die

 

 **patty:** why???

 

 **eyeliner:** im having an existential crisis

 

 **ryro:** wha

 

 **eyeliner:** do animals udnerstand the conccept of death

 

 **patty:** pls dont

 

eyeliner: i just

 

 **eyeliner:** im not stoned enough for this

 

 **patty:** its ok pete

 

 **eyeliner:** its not okay

 

 **eyeliner:** im not ok

 

 **gerald:** promise?

 

 **eyeliner:** wha

 

 **gerald:** wat

 

 **eyeliner:** ok then

 

 **eyeliner:** HE'S TALKING ABT HOW JETSKIS ARE THE KEY TO HAPPINESS

 

 **eyeliner:** WHAT HAS MY LIFE BECOME

 

 **eyeliner:** poor josh is suffering with me

 

 **tylier** : JOSH IS IN YOUR PHILOSOPHY CLASS??????

 

 **tylier:** i mean

 

 **eyeliner:** "im not gay," he says

 

 **tylier:** IM NOT

 

 **eyeliner:** sure you're not

 

 **eyeliner:** but yeah he's in my class

 

 **eyeliner:** actually

 

 **eyeliner:** lmao

 

 **tylier:** what

 

_eyeliner has added spooky jim to the groupchat!_

 

 **spooky jim:** what the heck is this

 

 **eyeliner:** hi everyone introduce yourselves

 

 **patty:** patrick

 

 **Forehead:** bRENDON IM IN YOUR SPANISH CLASS

 

 **gerald:** gerald

 

 **spooky jim:** that's confusing

 

 **ryro:** im ryan

 

 **tylier:** u. hi. tyler.

 

 **frnk:** im frank!

 

 **eyeliner:** and you know me. the greatest person in existence.

 

 **spooky jim:** wow i didnt know mark hoppus was in this chat

 

 **eyeliner:** fuck you

 

 **spooky jim:** hi im josh

 

 **gerald:** why is your name spooky jim is your name is josh

 

 **spooky jim:** the aesthetic

 

 **spooky jim:** pete did you tell them abt philosophy

 

 **eyeliner:** YES THATS WHY YOURE HERE

 

 **spooky jim:** omg

 

 **spooky jim:** our professor is talking about his two goldfish he got over the weekend

 

 **eyeliner:** he's really stressed out abt them

 

 **spooky jim:** "i got two goldfish over the weekend. big mistake"

 

 **eyeliner:** "they're driving me insane"

 

 **Forehead:** what the fuck

 

 **eyeliner:** "am i feeding them too much? am i feeding them enough? how often do i have to change the water? if this is how im feeling, iamgine how crazy parents must be"

 

 **tylier:** someone should tell him that goldfish can live like thirty years

 

 **eyeliner:** that would break him

 

 **spooky jim:** iM GONNA TELL HIM

 

 **eyeliner:** DONT YOU DARE

 

 **eyeliner:** oh ym god

 

 **eyeliner:** "DONT TELL ME THAT, JOSHUA"

 

 **eyeliner:** IM SOBBING

 

 **tylie:** emo wentz

 

_eyeliner has changed their name to emo wentz!_

 

 **emo wentz:** much more fitting

 

 **spooky jim:** apparently i broke our professor so much that he just sent us home thirty minutes early

 

 **emo wentz:** LETS GO GET MILKSHAKES

 

 **frnk:** can we come

 

 **spooky jim:** HECK YES

 

 **gerald:** goddamn someone's excited for milkshakes

 

 **spooky jim:** doNT SAY THE LORD'S NAME IN VAIN, GERARD

 

 **gerald:** i

 

 **frnk:** oh my god

 

 **tylier:** guys

 

 **gerald:** i ship it

 

 **spooky jim:** what

 

 **tylier:** shut the heck up, gerald

 

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> my tumblr is tyjo-exe and my twitter is @GOLNGTOOFAST. hmu. leave a comment. aye.


	5. #TylerIsOverParty

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> bagels at 12:30 in the morning are always a good idea. just ask tyler and josh.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> guess who's back.

**12:47 AM**

 

 **tylier:** jish is my new best fren everyone else can go home

 

 **tylier:** *josh

 

 **Forehead:** BETRAYAL

 

 **patty:** jish

 

 **ryro:** jish ,,,

 

_spooky jim has changed their name to jish_

 

 **Forehead:** why does he have my title as your bff :(

 

 **tylier:** he's buying me and jenna dunkin rn

 

 **emo wentz:** ty u dont even drink coffee

 

 **patty:** isnt it a bit late for coffee

 

 **tylier:** IT'S NEVER TOO LATE FOR TEA

 

 **jish:** the drive-thru is open 24/7

 

 **patty:** arent you driving

 

 **tylier:** jenna's driving

 

 **jish:** im just paying

 

 **tylier:** jenna's never been through the drivethru before

 

 **tylier:** like she's never driven through one

 

 **jish:** im telling her what to do it's glorious

 

 **jish:** "i always thought that when i took my first drive through a drive-thru, i'd at least have a bra on"

 

 **Forehead:** ooooooooooh

 

 **Forehead:** no bra, tylier ;) what were you two lovebirds up to ;)

 

 **tylier:** WE'RE NOT DATING, BRENDON

 

 **gerald:** otp

 

 **tylier:** stfu gerald

 

 **tylier:** we literally woke her up at midnight to get dunkin

 

 **tylier:** she's in her pjs

 

 **tylier:** it's an actual onesie

 

 **jish:** why did we decide this was a good idea

 

 **tylier:** bc you and i wanted bagels and jenna's the only one with a car

 

 **jish:** oh yeah

 

 **tylier:** i just hope she doesn't drive too close to the building and knock the mirror off

 

 **patty:** didn't you do that at taco bell once

 

 **tylier:** dont expose me like this, patrick

 

 **jish:** #TylerIsOverParty

 

            _tylier has kicked jish out of the group chat._

            _patty has added jish to the group chat!_

 

 **jish:** my own best fren

 

 **Forehead:** #TYLERISOVERPARTY

 

 **emo wentz:** someone get it trending on twitter

 

 **tylier:** i hate all of you

 

 **jish:** jenna just side swiped the building and took out her own mirror

 

 **gerald:** #JennaIsOverParty

 

 **Forehead:** #JylerIsOverParty

 

 **tylier:** what the heck is a jyler

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> my tumblr is tyjo-exe and my twitter is @GOLNGTOOFAST. hmu. leave a comment. aye.


	6. i had a dream i was a demon

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> brendon's going to hell and socrates is a drama queen.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> why do i write these things

**8:23 PM**

_Forehead is typing…_

 

 **Forehead:** i just took a nap and had a dream that i was a demon

 

 **tylier:** :/

 

 **jish:** uhm

 

 **ryro:** so..... you had a normal dream abt yourself????

 

 **Forehead:** fuck you, george

 

 **patty:** what did you look like as a demon

 

 **Forehead:** fuckin blue skin. horns

 

 **emo wentz:** sick

 

 **ryro:** maybe that's why your forehead is so big. so your horns can grow in when you hit puberty

 

 **Forehead:** FUCK YOU, GEORGE

 

 **jish:** what were you doing in your dream

 

 **Forehead:** summoning satan, probably

 

 **tylier:** can u not

 

 **frnk:** siCK

 

 **ryro:** bren that's kinda fucked up

 

 **Forehead:** ur kinda fucked up

 

 **ryro:** u cant say that to me

 

 **Forehead:** why not

 

 **ryro:** bc i sucked your dick

 

 **Forehead:** o yeah

 

 **gerald:** WH A  T

 

 **tylier:** sI N S IN SIN SIN SIN !!!!

 

 **jish:** my pure eyes

 

 **frnk:** are you guys actually surprised

 

 **jish:** GUYS PETE CANT STOP LAUGHING IN PHILOSOPHY

 

 **jish:** THE PROFESSOR LOOKS LIKE HE'S GONNA KICK HIM OUT OF CLASS AND I CANT GO THROUGH THIS ALONE

 

 **patty:** knowing pete he'll get kicked out in two minutes

 

 **jish:** he kEEPS CALLING SOCRATES A DRAMA QUEEN AND CACKLING

 

 **emo wentz:** hE WOULD GO INTO THE ROMAN SQUARE AND JUST IRL ROAST PEOPLE YOU GUYS

 

 **jish:** it's true

 

 **emo wentz:** he had fuckin fan boys (aka plato) who would totally just egg him on it's so goddamn funny

 

 **jish:** PETE

 

 **tylier:** the lorD'S NAME

 

 **emo wentz:** socrates didnt believe that the god's were petty motherfuckers

 

 **emo wentz:** or at least "not as petty as the romans made them out to be"

 

 **emo wentz:** AND THE ROMANS DEF WANTED TO KILL HIM FOR SAYING THAT, YEAH?? FOR "DISRESPECTING THE GODS" AND "CORRUPTING THE YOUTH" AND ITS FUNNY BC ITS TRUE

 

 **emo wentz:** AND HIS RESPONSE TO BEING ACCUSED OF THESE THINGS IS BASICALLY JUST "fuck you guys i helped the state you should be praising me"

 

 **jish:** he spent his last few hours before his death drinking and talking abt philosophy with his fren's

 

 **emo wentz:** then he killed himself

 

 **emo wentz:** so fuckin extra

 

 **emo wentz:** oh mY GOD WE'RE BACK ON THE SUBJECT OF JET-SKIS HOW

 

 **emo wentz:** IM GONNA JUMP OFF OF THE BUILDING

 

 **patty:** pete i s2g

 

 **Forehead:** JOSH RECORD IT

 

 **ryro:** do a backflip

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> my tumblr is tyjo-exe and my twitter is @GOLNGTOOFAST. hmu. leave a comment. aye.


	7. fast food greasy taco i love,

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> josh skips philosophy and pete tells them what's up

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> i feel like i havent updated in eight billion years.

**8:22 PM**

 

__t_ ylier is typing…_

 

 **tylier:** jish

 

 **tylier:** jish jish jishwa

 

 **jish:** what's up, ty

 

 **gerald:** tHEY HAVE NICKNAMES FOR EACH OTHER

 

 **tylier:** shut the heck up, gerald

 

 **tylier:** but jish im getting taco bell come with me

 

 **jish:** im in class??????

 

 **tylier:** ,,,, so?

 

 **emo wentz:** jish is a good christian boy he wouldn't sk

 

 **emo wentz:** he just fucking

 

 **emo wentz:** stood up and left the room without a WORD

 

 **jish:** boy bye

 

 **gerald:** kadsjkjflKDKFD;FJDSFKDOFMKJ

 

 **frnk:** breathe, gee

 

 **gerald:** i canNOT

 

 **emo wentz:** i cant believe you would do this to me, josh

 

 **emo wentz:** you kept me emotionally stable through this class

 

 **emo wentz:** i have no reason to go on

 

 **emo wentz:** i was in love with you, josh

 

 **patty:** ahem

 

 **Forehead:** OOOOOOOOOOO

 

 **ryro:** #PeteIsOverParty

 

 **emo wentz:** patrick bby

 

 **patty:** divorced

 

 **frnk:** you guys arent even married

 

 **gerald:** am i the only one who noticed that brendon and ryan got here at the same time

 

 **Forehead:** ;)

 

 **tylier:** FAST FOOD GREASY

 

 **patty:** what

 

 **tylier:** TACO I LOVE

 

 **Forehead:** what the

 

 **gerald:** im scared

 

 **tylier:** FOOD LIKE THIS COULD ONLY COME FROM ABOVE

 

**jish:**

 

 **emo wentz:** HOW DID YOU GUYS GET THERE SO FAST

 

 **jish:**  we teleported

 

 **emo wentz:** you're eating taco bell and im stuck in philosophy, fuck you

 

 **emo wentz:** actually maybe it's a good thing you left bc we're talking abt the anti-christ and the attack on jedo-chrstian morality

 

 **jish:** nietzsche?

 

 **emo wentz:** yep

 

 **tylier:** ew

 

 **gerald:** talk nihilism to me

 

 **emo wentz:** higher humans

 

 **emo wentz:** creative will to power

 

 **emo wentz:** herd instinct

 

 **tylier:** pls stop

 

 **emo wentz:** god is dead

 

 **jish:** BLASPHEMY

 

 **emo wentz:** supremecy

 

 **emo wentz:** atheism

 

 **emo wentz:** master morality

 

 **emo wentz:** this is what happens when you leave me alone in philosophy, josh

 

 **jish:** i'll never leave you again

 

 **emo wentz:** I DONT WANNA BE HERE

 

 **frnk:** jfc

 

 **emo wentz:** pls kill me

 

 **Forehead:** anyways

 

 **Forehead:** josh did you develop your pictures for photography yet

 

 **tylier:** you take photography???

 

 **jish:** no?????????

 

 **Forehead:** oh i must be in the wrong alternative universe

 

 **jish:** what

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> hi i started writing a new fic it's not up or anything but it will be (and it might have to do with something brendon said lmao) also i was dissociating the whole time i wrote this so judge me
> 
> my tumblr is tyjo-exe and my twitter is @GOLNGTOOFAST. hmu. leave a comment. aye.


	8. may the fourth be with you.

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> and also with you.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> a breaking point is reached,

**7:45 PM**

 

 **jish:** if we have more than one discussion abt higher humanity and nihilism im actually gonna kms

 

 **jish:** not because of the actual material

 

 **jish:** but because pete keeps complaining

 

 **emo wentz:** it's...... so boring........

 

 **Forehead:** ripete

 

 **tylier:** isnt this your last class before your final

 

 **emo wentz:** YOU RIGHT

 

 **Forehead:** are we just gonna ignore my glorious pun,

 

 **emo wentz:** i hope you choke on ryan's dick, breadbin

 

 **jish:** bre  A D BIN  ,

 

 **patty:** hey hey hey hey

 

 **patty:** do you guys know what today is

 

 **tylier:** no

 

 **patty:**  may the fourth be with you

 

 **tylier:** what

 

 **Forehead:** it's star wars day, bitch

 

 **gerald:** DID SOMEBODY SAY STAR WARS

 

 **emo wentz:** i know when that jar jar binks

 

 **jish:** yousa used to call meesa on my comlink

 

 **frnk:** late night when yousa need meesa love

 

 **ryro:** you guyS ARE RUINING JAR JAR BINKS

 

 **jish:** HE WAS RUINED TO BEGIN WITH, GEORGE RYAN ROSS.

 

 **Forehead:** *George Ryan Ross the Third

 

 **tylier:** wow

 

 **ryro:** choke, breadbin

 

 **Forehead:** maybe later tonight ;)

 

 **patty:** i say we have a star wars marathon after pete and josh get out of philosophy

 

 **ryro:** patrick we get out of chemistry after them

 

 **patty:** ?????????? ryan we dont have chem lab anymore we handed everything in last week

 

 **ryro:** that.... explains why i'm the only one in the classroom

 

 **patty:** how long have you been there,

 

 **ryro:** like. fifteen minutes.

 

 **emo wentz:** we're getting our teacher evaluation sheets in a bit

 

 **emo wentz:** i canno t WA I T to fuck this guy up with my poetic words

 

 **jish:** pls be gentle with our teacher

 

 **jish:** he is a broken man bc of his goldfish:

 

 **tylier:** did..... did they die

 

 **emo wentz:** no they're thriving

 

 **jish:** that's why he's so fragile

 

 **emo wentz:** he's going crazy

 

 **tylier:** ...... o

 

 **jish:** "life is useless" me too

 

 **tylier:** JOSHUA WILLIAM DUN

 

 **patty:** uh oh

 

 **tylier:** dO NOT SAY THAT

 

 **tylier:** YOU IS SMART

 

 **tylier:** YOU IS KIND

 

 **tylier:** YOU IS IMPORTANT

 

 **tylier:** I WILL MAKE YOU BELIEVE YOU ARE LOVELY

 

 **Forehead:** gayass nerd

 

 **emo wentz:** i cant tell if josh is crying or giggling

 

 **tylier:** good

 

 **emo wentz:** "a perfect world would just be denmark everywhere" i cannot wait to get out of this class once and for all

 

 **tylier:** fun fact i havent seen any of the star wars movies

 

 **jish:** ty L E RJO SE P H 

 

 **Forhead:** #TYLERISOVERPARTY

 

 **emo wentz:** #TYLERISOVERPARTY

 

 **gerald:**  #TYLERISOVERPARTY

 

 **patty:** tyler,,, how could you,,,,

 

 **frnk:**  #TYLERISOVERPARTY

 

 **ryro:**  #TYLERISOVERPARTY

 

 **patty:** we're definitely having a star wars marathon now

 

 **frnk:** what order should we watch them in tho,,,

 

 **jish:** rogue one, a new hope, the empire strikes back, the return of the jedi, the phantom menace, attack of the clones, revenge of the sith, the force awakens

 

 **Forehead:** isnt it blasphemy to start a star wars marathon that doesnt start with a lucas film

 

 **gerald:** just watch them in the order they came out ????????

 

 **jish:** you cant just go from the force awakens to rogue one that doesnt make sense

 

 **frnk:** i like josh's order but just cut the phantom menace

 

 **jish:** exsqueeeeeeeeze me

 

 **frnk:** see thats why

 

 **jish:** do yousa not like podracing

 

 **jish:** also wtf ewan mcgregor was hot in phantom menace

 

 **patty:** we're just going in josh's order

 

 **emo wentz:** aight josh and i are on our way

 

 **ryro:** breadbin and i are comin

 

 **tylier:** i'll get popcorn

 

 **frnk:** i got soda

 

 **Forehead:** i'll bring the weEEEEEEEEED

 

 **tylier:** pls do not

 

 **patty:** NO WEED IN MY DORM, BREADBIN

 

 **patty:** BRENDON

 

 ** **patty:**** HELLO

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> my tumblr is tyjo-exe and my twitter is @GOLNGTOOFAST. hmu. leave a comment. aye.


	9. calm down, gertrude

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> a family vacation falls through (thanks tyler)

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> LISTEN I HAVE NO EXCUSE AS TO WHY I HAVENT UPLOADED IN A BILLION YEARS

**5:33 AM**

 

 **jish:** shoutout to breadbin for taking me to the airport

 

 **Forehead:** i'm the best, i know

 

 **jish:** i wouldnt go that far tbh

 

 **Forehead:**  :C

 

 **patty:** airport??????

 

 **jish:** im visiting a few relatives in la for a week

 

 **gerald:** i wanna go to LA wtf josh invite me next time

 

 **emo wentz:** how's tyler taking you being gone lmao

 

 **ryro:** not well

 

 **ryro:** he and i said bye to josh before brendon took him to the airport and it wasnt fun

 

 **tylier:** i dont wanna talk abt it

 

 **patrick:** you guys got really close in the like. month you've known each other

 

 **tylier:** he's my best fren

 

 **frnk:** ty are u crying

 

 **tylier:** no

 

 **ryro:** yes he is

 

 **jish:** omg baby boy noooo i'll be back before you know it

 

 **gerald:** bAB Y BOUY WHA T THE F U

 

 **emo wentz:** calm down, gertrude

 

 **gerald:** SUCK MY DICK, WENTZ

 

 **tylier:** jiiiiiish come back i miss u

 

 **jish:** i wish i could :( but im boarding the plane in like five minutes

 

 **tylier:** :(

 

 **jish:** ...........

 

 **patrick:** uhm

 

 **Forehead:** wha

 

 **Forehead:** why do i see a puff of pink hair running from the TSA line

 

 **Forehead:** JOSHA WILLIAM DUN I DROVE FORTY FIVE MINUES TO THE AIRPORT FOR YOU

 

 **tylier:** what

 

 **Forehead:** HE DEADASS JUST JUMPED OVER THE RAILS AND SPRINTED TO THE CAR

 

 **tylier:** joSH WHAT THE HECK

 

 **jish:** i missed u already

 

 **frnk:** guys you're going to give gee a heartattack

 

 **patrick:** josh you paid actual money for that ticket???????

 

 **jish:** technically my parents paid actual money for that ticket

 

 **gerald:** i SHIP IT!!!!!!!!!

 

 **tylier:** im gonna cry again

 

 **ryro:** he's being completely serious he's tearing tf up

 

 **jish:** TY IM ON MY WAY TO YOU

 

 **frnk:** JOSH YOUR RELAT IV  ES 

 

 **jish:** ....... they'll understand ???????

 

 **emo wentz:** how do you guys call yourselves heterosexual

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> my tumblr is tyjo-exe and my twitter is @GOLNGTOOFAST. hmu. leave a comment. aye.


	10. fuck you too, george.

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> im sorry omg.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> dallon weekes could punch me in the face and i'd probably thank him.  
> anyways. hi i've been sick lately and i havent had time to update so pls bear with me as i try to get more stuff done with this.

**** _ryro has left the groupchat._

 

**** _Forehead has changed the chat name to "FUCK YOU TOO, GEORGE"_

 

 **patty:** uhm

 

 **tylier:** ok ???

 

 **jish:** is........ is anyone gonna add him back, or

 

 **Forehead:** The person who adds him back gets fucking kicked out.

 

 **jish:** oh.

 

 **emo wentz:** trouble in paradise?

 

 **Forehead:** Fuck you.

 

 **patty:** hey there now,

 

 **emo wentz:** holy shit, man. calm down.

 

 **gerald:** what is even going on??????

 

 **Forehead:** ryan and i broke up. 

 

 **tylier:** o h.

 

 **frnk:** shit. u ok?

 

 **Forehead:** does it fucking look like im okay

 

 **jish:** dude. stop being an asshole. this suck, i know, but being a dick to the rest of us isn't going to make you feel better.

 

 **emo wentz:** did he just,,,

 

 **gerald:** he did

 

 **frnk:** JOSH SWORE

 

 **jish:** calm yourselves

 

 **Forehead:** you're right

 

 **Forehead:** i'm sorry it's just

 

 **Forehead:** i'm mad and upset and high and idk what to even do

 

 **Forehead:** it :) fucking hurts :)

 

 **jish:** i'm coming over

 

 **tylier:** me, too

 

 **gerald:** frankie and i will b there soon !!!!

 

 **emo wentz:** it's gonna be okay, man.

 

 **emo wentz:** we're here for you. all of us.

 

 **Forehead:** what did i do to deserve you guys?

 

 **frnk:** you give us weed

 

 **Forehead:** tru

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> my tumblr is tyjo-exe and my twitter is @GOLNGTOOFAST. hmu. leave a comment. aye.


	11. THERE ARE GIANTS IN THE SKYYYYY

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> a new tall glass of water joins the chat

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I. LOVE. DALLON. WEEKES.

**6:45 PM**

 

**** _emo wentz_ _is typing..._

 

 **emo wentz:** who's the tallest here

 

 **patty:** not me or you

 

 **frnk:** it was ryan

 

 **Forehead:** lol who's ryan

 

 **jish:** aren't brendon ty and gee all the same height

 

 **frnk:** roughly yeah

 

 **tylier:** why??????

 

 **emo wentz:** i made a new friend and he is super tall

 

 **emo wentz:** taller than any of us

 

 **emo wentz:** he's like,,, a giant

 

 **Forehead:** there aRE GIANTS IN THE SKY!

 

 **Forehead:** THERE ARE BIG TALL TERRIBLE GIANTS IN THE SKYYYYYYYY

 

 **frnk:** no more showtunes, pls,

 

 **jish:** how tall is this new fren

 

 **emo wentz:** like forty feet tall

 

 **emo wentz:** idk like over six feet

 

 **patty:** o:

 

 **tylier:** is he cool

 

 **tylier:** us tall people are always p sick

 

 **emo wentz:** he's p cool

 

 **emo wentz:** his name is dallon weekes

 

 **jish:** !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

 

 **jish:** I KNOW HIM

 

 **jish:** he was in my music theory class last semester!!!!!!!!!!

 

 **jish:** literally the sickest person ever

 

 **tylier:** uhm

 

 **tylier:** excuse u

 

 **jish:** other than tyler

 

 **gerald:** well

 

 **gerald:** is someone gonna add dallon or

 

 **jish:** o yeah

 

 

**** _jish has added legs to the groupchat!_

 

 

 **legs:** uhm

 

 **tylier:** git ur own fren

 

 **legs:** what

 

 **jish:** WHAT TYLER MEANS TO SAY IS

 

 **emo wentz:** WELCOME TO HELL!!!!!!

 

 **legs:** who r u people

 

 **legs:** who is george and why are we fucking him

 

 **gerald:** we dont talk abt george

 

 **Forehead:** FUCK GEORGE

 

 **jish:** u know me

 

 **emo wentz:** im pete we literally met like ten minutes ago

 

 **patty:** im patrick!!!

 

 **gerald** : gerard

 

 **frnk:** frank

 

 **Forehead:** hi im brendon

 

 **legs:** hi im dallon

 

 **legs:** why am i here

 

 **tylier:** idk

 

 **jish:** bc this is the Cool Dudes Club and we needed another Cool Dude

 

 **patty:** since when have any of us been considered cool

 

**** _jish has changed the chat name to "Cool Dudes Club '17"_

 

 **Forehead:** patrick,,,,, im insulted

 

 **frnk:** brendon you're literally the lamest one here

 

 **Forehead:** kys frank

 

 **legs:** can i leave

 

 **Forehead:** NO

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> my tumblr is tyjo-exe and my twitter is @GOLNGTOOFAST. hmu. leave a comment. aye.


	12. clap your feet and stomp your hands

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> patrick stump, the sole person in this group chat who doesn't smoke pot.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> what is this ??? is this even technically an update ??? its too dumb to be a proper update

**1:20 AM**

 

         _legs is typing..._

 

 **legs:** on a scale of one to ten

 

 **legs:** how high is everyone right now

 

 **Forehead:** 5'9"

 

 **Forehead:** oh wait

 

 **legs:** goodness gracious

 

 **tylier:** beebo is at like a twenty one rn

 

 **Forehead:** literally wtf is a beebo

 

 **Forehead:** that doesn't even make s e n s e

 

 **Forehead:** shouldnt it be like

 

 **Forehead:** brebo

 

 **jish:** brebo doesnt have the same ring that beebo does

 

          _Forehead has changed their name to beebo!_

 

 **beebo:** makes sense

 

 **jish:** wow

 

 **patty:** i think brendon is the only one who's actually high

 

 **jish:** lol nope

 

 **tylier:** j o s h

 

 **jish:**  ¯\\_(ツ)_/¯

 

 **emo wentz:** he's messing up the words to the song he wrote

 

 **legs:** how?

 

 **gerald:** "clap your feet and stomp your hands"

 

 **legs:** ... it took me a minute to realize what was wrong with that statement

 

 **emo wentz:** .. dallon. are you high rn,

 

 **legs:** ,,,, no

 

 **frnk:** dallon's high omf

 

 **patty:** am i still the only one in this chat who doesn't smoke pot

 

 **jish:** yep

 

 **frnk:** pretty much

 

 **tylier:** yah

 

 **emo wentz:** yeah, babe

 

 **legs:** whoops?

 

 **gerald:** its a yes from me

 

 **patty:** you guys are the worst

 

 **emo wentz:** we know

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> beebo saying "clap your feet and stomp your hands" is something i do,, all the fuckin' time.
> 
> my tumblr is tyjo-exe and my twitter is @GOLNGTOOFAST. hmu. leave a comment. aye.


	13. daddy

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> sad dad?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> dallon doesn't understand the daddy kink bc he's just a pun dad.

**11:30 PM**

 

 **beebo:** im so hungryyyy

 

 **legs:** hi so hungryyyy, have you seen my friend, brendon

 

 **beebo:** kys dallon

 

 **frnk:** he just made a fucking dad joke

 

 **emo wentz:** YAAAAAAS DADDY

 

 **legs:** yep thats me dad i am everyones sad

 

 **legs:** *dad

 

 **gerald:** sad dad

 

 **tylier:** he looks like a sad dad

 

 **jish:** the saddest of dads

 

 **beebo:** have you guys even met dallon

 

 **beebo:** he's not sad he's hoity toity

 

 **beebo:** like come on

 

 **legs:** :(

 

 **beebo:** FUCK OFF

 

 **gerald:** you made him a sad dad

 

 **beebo:** i guess ill just go kms

 

 **legs:** same :(

 

 **beebo:** GODDAMNIT

 

 **tylier:** BRENDON

 

 **jish:** THE LORD'S NAME

 

 **legs:** DONT USE IT IN VAIN

 

 **tylier:** omg

 

 **jish:** o m g

 

 **tylier:** ONE OF US ONE OF US

 

 **jish:** welcome to the Cool Religious Dudes Club '17™

 

 **patty:** oh no

 

            _tylier has changed the chat name to Cool Religious Dudes Club '17™_

 

 **beebo:** BITCH NO

 

             _beebo has changed the chat name to GOD IS DEAD_

 

 **emo wentz:** NOT THIS AGAIN

 

 **emo wentz:** NO MORE NIHILISM

 

            _emo wentz has changed the chat name to SHUT THE FUCK UP_

**frnk:** can you maybe chill

 

 **emo wentz:** how about maybe you chill

 

 **gerald:** frank is kind of scared of pete. you know who else is kind of scared of pete? me.

 

 **legs:** what has this chat become

 

 **tylier:** it was worse when ryan was still around lbr

 

 **beebo:** LMAO WHO'S RYAN HAHAHAHA

 

 **jish:** we don't speak of the dark one

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> sorry god.
> 
> my tumblr is tyjo-exe and my twitter is @GOLNGTOOFAST. hmu. leave a comment. aye.


	14. a shitshow.

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> the infamous dick pick, dallon joins the group of ryro haters, and beebo probably has a daddy kink.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> my fiancé inspired me to write this

**3:38 PM**

 

 **legs:** i hate ryan ross

 

 **beebo:** fuck daddy long legs im gonna cum

 

 **frnk:** whaAT THE FYCK

 

          _legs has changed their name to daddy long legs!_

 

 **tylier:** do you have a boner now wtf

 

 **daddy long legs:** maybe

 

 **jish:** ew

 

 **beebo:** ;)

 

 **emo wentz:** wait why do you hate ryan ross

 

 **daddy long legs:** he said he didn't like my bowtie

 

 **tylier:** why are you wearing a bowtie

 

 **daddy long legs:** why not

 

 **tylier:** fair point

 

 **gerald:** lets go fuck Jim up

 

 **tylier:** hey Now

 

 **gerald:** I MEANT HIM NOT JIM

 

 **jish:** im crying

 

 **beebo:** you're an allstar

 

 **emo wentz:** get your game on

 

 **emo wentz:** GUYS WANNA SEE A PICTURE OF A CUTE DOG

 

 **jish:** always

 

 **frnk:** DOG

 

 **emo wentz:** [new picture message!]

 

 **gerald:** OH MY GOD WHAT IS THAT

 

 **jish:** MY EYES

 

 **daddy long legs:** WHY PETE WHY

 

 **emo wentz:** FUCK NO WAIT IM SORRY I HIT THE WRONG PICTURE

 

 **tylier:** WHY IS THERE A PICTURE OF YOUR DICK PETE IM GOING TO CRY

 

 **patty:** im going to kill myself and my boyfriend

 

 **beebo:** guys,,

 

 **beebo:** it's not a bad dick

 

 **beebo:** lets be real

 

 **daddy long legs:** this is the worst day ever

 

          _emo wentz has left the group chat_

 

 **beebo:** bitch

 

         _beebo_   _has added emo wentz to the group chat!_

 

 **beebo:** idc if you're upset abt leaking your own dick pick you're going to stay here and own it

 

 **tylier:** motivational speaker of the year award goes to........

 

 **beebo:** hey so anyways

 

 **beebo:** dallon is this a bad time for me to ask to suck your dick

 

 **jish:** guys can you not

 

 **daddy long legs:** yeah literally not a worse time or place to ask

 

 **beebo:** want me to private message you

 

 **tylier:** oh my gosh

 

 **daddy long legs:** i

 

 **daddy long legs:** yeah why not

 

 **gerald:** WAHT THE FCK IS GOIN G O N

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> IM SO SORRY ABT THIS TRAIN WRECK LMAO.
> 
> my tumblr is tyjo-exe and my twitter is @GOLNGTOOFAST. hmu. leave a comment. aye.


	15. dømingø en fuegø????

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> everyone is confusion.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I HATE TYLER JOSEPH FOR PLAYING WITH MY EMOTIONS WHY CAN'T THEY ANNOUNCE A SMALL BREAK NORMALLY.
> 
> wow i hope this weird ass font works.

**4:45 PM**

 

 **Forehead:** why the heck is tyler Robert joseph so extra

 

 **Forehead:** why is he playing with my emotions like this

 

 **tylier:**  ɘm bniʇ bnɒ ɘmøɔ oɈ ɘvɒʜ ll'υøγ

 

 **Forehead:** stop

 

 **gerald:** i am Confusion

 

 **tylier:**  ɿɘqɘɘlƨ γɈɈɘɿq γm

 

 **patty:** ?????

 

 **tylier:**  ⸮nwøb γɒl Ɉƨυį blυøɔ ɘw ʇi Ɉɒɘɿϱ ɘd Ɉi Ɉ'nblυøw

 

 **emo wentz:** so if we just dont reply do you think he'll stop or

 

 **tylier:**  niɒϱɒ Ɉʜϱin ɘʜɈ ɿɒɘʇ lliw i

 

 **daddy long legs** : ty,,,, buddy,,,,,,

 

 **tylier:**  ʞnild γɘʜɈ nɘʜw ƨmɒɘɿb γbødøn

 

 **frnk:** hey josh what is your boyfriend doing

 

 **jish:** we're not dating

 

 **jish:** but i have no idea what you're talking abt

 

 **Forehead:** dun i swear to god

 

 **jish:** leave me alone im just playing the drums

 

 **tylier:**  bɒɘb ƨi Ɉʜϱin nɘʜw ƨi ϱninɿøm ɘʜɈ ɿɘdmɘmɘɿ

 

 **patty:** do we need to go check on him

 

 **jish:** nah he's fine

 

 **tylier:**  ɘɔnɘliƨ ni Ɉiƨ Ɉƨυį i wøn bnɒ

 

 **gerald:** are you absolutely sure he's okay

 

 **jish:** it's just tyler being tyler, m dudes

 

 **daddy long legs:** ok fair point

 

          _tylier has left the group chat_

          _jish has left the group chat_

 

 **Forehead:** WHAT IS HAPPENING WHERE DID THEY GO

**Forehead:** IT'S NOT LETTING ME ADD THEM BACK

 

 **frnk:** five bucks says they're with each other laughing their asses off abt the mass confusion they just started

 

 **emo wentz:** it's just joshler bein' joshler!!!

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> i have been personally victimized by tyler joseph, josh dun, mark eshleman and brad heaton. 
> 
> my tumblr is tyjo-exe and my twitter is @GOLNGTOOFAST. hmu. leave a comment. aye.


	16. what the fuck does any of this mean?

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> cutting off ties with dema WHO

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> can the hiatus pls be over now.
> 
> welcome back, jish.
> 
> and WOW I LOVE JENNA BLACK

          _Forehead has added spooky jim to the chat!_

 

 **patty:** josh !!!!!!

 

 **frnk:** welcome back this chat has been Dead without you

 

 **daddy long legs:** and tyler

 

 **gerald:** i've missed joshler :(((((

 

 **Forehead:** ty still has us all blocked so he can't be added back into the chat

 

 **emo wentz:** jish tell us evERYTHING ABT WHAT'S GOING ON

 

 **spooky jim:** he's cutting off ties with dema

 

 **gerald:** wtf does that mean

 

 **spooky jim:**  ¯\\_(ツ)_/¯

 

 **spooky jim:** in all honestly, him and i are on our way to la

 

 **spooky jim:** my parents made me go but i was gonna miss tyler so i made him come with me

 

 **spooky jim:**  he's driving. we're Roadtripping.

 

 **spooky jim:** im scared for my life.

 

 **frnk:** oh no

 

 **emo wentz:** gerard is gonna start fangirling again

 

 **emo wentz:** i can feel it in my bones

 

 **gerald** : it' S SO BEAEUTIF U L

 

 **spooky jim:** anyways im adding jenna to this chat jsyk

 

 **spooky jim:** she's ty's girlfriend now

 

 **Forehead:** what

 

 **patty:** tyler has a girlfriend????? since when?????

 

 **gerald:** im crying

 

 **spooky jim:** im joking omg omg

 

 **spooky jim:** jenna's dating someone else

 

 **gerald:** thank GOD

 

 **Forehead:** my gay heart was about to explode

 

          _spooky jim has added doughnut girl to the chat!_

 

 **daddy long legs:** hi new friend

 

 **doughnut girl:** whoa that's a lot of people

 

 **Forehead:** whats up im brendon im 19 and i never learned how to fuckin' read

 

 **doughnut girl:** charming

 

 **frnk:** hi im frank

 

 **gerald:** geraaaaard

 

 **patty:** patrick!

 

 **daddy long legs:** dallon hi

 

 **emo wentz:** im pete and i need to know if ur str8

 

 **patty:** uh

 

 **emo wentz:** no Straights Allowed

 

 **doughnut girl:** uh,,,, no not straight i have a gf

 

 **emo wentz:** THANK GOD

 

 **patty:** if there's not straights allowed how do we explain tyler

 

 **gerald:** lol

 

 **daddy long legs:** lol

 

 **Forehead:** oooh patty there's so much you don't understand

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> how many of us are going crazy rn,,,
> 
> my tumblr is tyjo-exe and my twitter is @GOLNGTOOFAST. hmu. leave a comment. aye.


	17. philosophical rant time.

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> new year new philosophy class.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> i love all of my sons equally, especially josh, pete, tyler, patrick, frank, brendon, dallon, and *looks at smudged writing on hand* gerald.
> 
> this update is DUMB.

8:30 AM

 

 **Forehead:** how has the first week of classes been for y'all

 

 **emo wentz:** lolololol

 

 **patty:** he's stuck in another philosophy class

 

 **patty:** from like 8 to 9:30

 

 **spooky jim:** we're in the same class again!

 

 **spooky jim:** er, different type of philosophy, different teacher

 

 **gerald:** does this mean we get 8 am philosophical rants

 

 **emo wentz:** hell yeah

 

 **daddy long legs:** has anyone heard from tyler at all

 

 **daddy long legs:** *anyone other than josh, sorry

 

 **frnk:** yeah nope haven't heard from him since like july

 

 **Forehead:** i havent even seen him on campus :(

 

 **emo wentz:** hey josh

 

 **spooky jim:** im not answering an questions abt tyler thank u

 

 **emo wentz:** why havent you taken off your hat since i've seen you

 

 **spooky jim:** why do you care

 

 **emo wentz:** why havent you taken it off

 

 **spooky jim:** bc i dont want to

 

 **patty:** did you dye it an ugly color

 

 **emo wentz:** did you shave it

 

 **gerald:** tell us, jish

 

 **spooky jim:** i plead the fifth

 

 **Forehead:** TAKE OFF THE DAMN HAT JOSH

 

                _spooky jim has left the group chat._

 

 **gerald:** damn.

 

 **Forehead:** wtf

 

 **Forehead:** that's so not fair

 

 **emo wentz:** OK PHILOSOPHICAL RANT TIME

 

 **daddy long legs:** im scared

 

 **frnk:** this should be fun

 

 **emo wentz:** we were talking about fuckin memes in this class and i zoned out for like two seconds and somehow we're talking about socrates now

 

 **emo wentz:** I FCKN HATE SOCRATES

 

 **daddy long legs:** why????

 

 **emo wentz:** bc he's a fucking drama queen, dallon, that's why

 

 **daddy long legs:** so is gerard but you don't hate him

 

 **gerald:** B)

 

 **emo wentz:** who says i dont hate gerard

 

 **gerald:** B(

 

 **gerald:** (im sad but im still cool)

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> my twitter is GOLNGTOOFAST and my tumblr is tyjo-exe. hmu or leave a comment. updates will be ~slower~ bc i'm back in school.


	18. he can be the token straight.

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> this time on: josh somehow knows everyone.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> hey look it didn't take me thirty years to upload a chapter !!!!!!

4:57 PM

 

          _Forehead has added spooky jim to the group chat!_

 

           _Forehead is typing..._

 

 **Forehead:** will u please stay now, best friend

 

 **spooky jim:** okaaaaaaaaay

 

 **Forehead:**  anyways hi im brendon boyd urie and i love my best friend, joshua william dun

 

 **spooky jim:** uh

 

 **daddy long legs:** i am Confusion

 

 **Forehead:** BBU + JWD = BFFL

 

 **gerald:** omfg

 

 **gerald:** o m f g

 

 **frnk:** are you saying this just to get tyler to respond

 

 **patty:** you do realize that he's not even in this chat, yes????

 

 **Forehead:** listen he somehow knows

 

 **Forehead:** i want him baaaaaack

 

 **spooky jim:** dude he isn't like a superhero he just reads over my shoulder most of the time

 

 **spooky jim:** besides i think he's with jenna and debby rn so you're saying this for No Reason

 

 **Forehead:** oh :(

 

 **frnk:** speaking of jenna why does she never talk in this

 

 **spooky jim:** she has it muted bc we frickin blow her phone up

 

 **gerald:** ok yea can't blame her

 

 **daddy long legs:**  brendon it's a good thing spencer isn't here he'd kick your ass if he read that you called josh your best friend

 

 **Forehead:** SPE NC E R MY LO VE I LOVE HIM HE'S THE BEST

 

 **gerald:** omgggggggggggg

 

 **spooky jim:** wait spencer

 

 **spooky jim:** as in spencer smith

 

 **Forehead:** wtf how do you know him

 

 **spooky jim:** we were in jazz band together!!!!!!

 

 **Forehead:** JOSH DO YOU KNOW EVERYONE

 

 **spooky jim:** prolly

 

 **frnk:** ADD HIM

 

 **daddy long legs:** we can't brendon said that there are no straights allowed

 

 **emo wentz:** no it's okay he can be the token straight

 

 **patty:** along with tyler?

 

 **emo wentz:** tyler is Not straight

 

 **patty:** but he says he is?????

 

 **emo wentz:** oh patty

 

 **Forehead:** y'all i dont even know spencer's kik im a terrible best friend

 

 **daddy long legs:** oh my fucking god

 

          _daddy long legs has added celluloid heroes to the group chat!_

 

 **celluloid heroes:** what kind of fresh hell is this

 

 **Forehead:** SPENCEEEEEEER!!!!!! ♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡

 

          _celluloid heroes has left the group chat._

 

 **Forehead:** what the fuck

 

          _Forehead has added celluloid heroes to the group chat!_

 

 **Forehead:** NO ONE LEAVES BITCH

 

 **celluloid heroes:** what did i do to deserve this

 

 **daddy long legs:** you became friends with brendon

 

 **celluloid heroes:** god help me

 

 **Forehead:** you guys are so mean :(

 

 **daddy long legs:** only bc we love you

 

 **Forehead:** awh :')

 

 **emo wentz:** i think i just threw up a little bit in my mouth

 

 **frnk:** same

 

 **gerald:** that was cute fuck y'all

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> my tumblr is tyjo-exe and my twitter is @GOLNGTOOFAST. hmu. leave a comment. aye.


	19. spooky jim has added blurryface to the groupchat!

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> the return of tyler?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> TWO UPDATES IN ONE DAY WHOOOOOOOOOA this one is pathetically sort sorry

6:15 PM

 

 **Forehead:** who's idea was it for me to have a 6 pm math class

 

 **frnk:** you, dumbass

 

 **patty:** you picked your own schedule, dude

 

 **Forehead:** yeah i picked it with

 

 **celluloid heroes:** ????

 

 **spooky jim:** picked it with..?

 

 **Forehead:** Ryan fucking Ross is in this class

 

 **celluloid heroes:** wha,

 

 **gerald:** no fucking way

 

 **celluloid heroes:** im gonna kick his ass

 

          _spooky jim has added blurryface to the groupchat!_

 

 **blurryface:** fuck ryan ross

 

            _blurryface has left the groupchat._

 

 **emo wentz:** was that tyler omfg

 

 **daddy long legs:** do you want me to go to your class and sit with you

 

 **Forehead:** please :(

 

 **daddy long legs:** ok omw

 

 **celluloid heroes:** i'll come too and sit on the other side so there's no way he can be near you

 

 **Forehead:** you hate math tho

 

 **celluloid heroes:** i love you more than i hate math, bren

 

 **Forehead:** IM CRYING REAL TEARS

 

 **patty:** that was so sweet omg

 

 **gerald:** dallon how are you even going to get into the buiLDING you don't go to school here anymore my dude

 

 **daddy long legs:** i have my ways

 

 **patty:** wow that's ominous

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> my tumblr is tyjo-exe and my twitter is @GOLNGTOOFAST. hmu. leave a comment ( they bring me joy! ). aye.


	20. THE FORBIDDEN FRUIT!!!!!!!!

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> brendon says goodbye to dallon, and patrick hates your local teenagers.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> are you sure we shouldn't eat the M A N I A bath bombs, patrick.
> 
> dallon left panic! and....... my acne is back i am failing my classes my crops are DESTROYED (no hate i love dallon and im proud of idkhbtfm and i wish him the best!!)
> 
> also sorry for not updating in like five months im the worst I GET IT.

**1:37 PM**

 

          _beebo is typing..._

 

 **beebo:** my ass is exhausted

 **emo wentz:**  ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)

 **beebo:** i'm going to kick YOUR ass

 **patty:** pete pls have some decency

 **emo wentz:** my decency isn't what made you fall in love with me

 **patty:** this is true

 **gerald:** so, you and dallon finally properly hooked up

 **beebo:** yeah

 **beebo:** it was his going away present lmao

 **emo wentz:** r i g h t he left for his mission last night didn't he

 **beebo:** this morning if u wanna get technical

 **frnk:** so are you guys like

 **frnk:** a thing??????

 **beebo:** i mean

 **beebo:** he's going to be gone for two fckn years

 **beebo:** we both agreed that it probably wouldn't work out since he can't even have his phone now

 **beebo:** but..... it's ok

 **spooky jim:** im sorry, bren :(

 **spooky jim:** you always seem to get the short straw

 **beebo:** meeeeeeh it's fine

 **beebo:** what's the gay ass saying

 **beebo:** better to have fucked and lost than to never have fucked at all

 **celluloid heroes:** i dont think that's how the saying is at all

 **beebo:** either way..... he's gonna come back sometime

 **celluloid heroes:** he really liked you a lot, bren

 **celluloid heroes:** i wouldn't worry too much about it

 **beebo:** i hope you're right

 **beebo:** i really really really really like him too and he's really nice and this is sO STUPID

 **beebo:** ugh nvm it's not okay someone distract me

 **emo wentz:** someone in my history class told me they tried to eat a bath bomb

 **patty:** NO NONONONON NO NO N O

 **patty:** DO NOT EAT BATH BOMBS OH MY GO D

 **emo wentz:** you sure?

 **patty:** YES

 **patty:** THEY ARE FOR BATHING

 **patty:** NOT FOR CONSUMING

 **patty:** IT'S NOT CHOCOLATE

 **gerald:** at least it's not tide pods

 **beebo:** the forbidden fruit!!!1!!11!!!!!!

 **emo wentz:** wrong thing to say

 **patty:** i hate ALL OF YOU

 **patty:** except for frank and josh

 **frnk:** :^)

 **spooky jim:** love u too

 **gerald:** damn boy you're gettin fucking HEATED over this shit lmao

 **patty:** i have very little tolerance for stupid people

 **patty:** natural selection will do it's work

 **emo wentz:** then how are you friends with brendon??????

 **beebo:** fuck you

 **beebo:** i just remembered that dallon promised to write me letters my mood just increased by 300%

 **spooky jim:** im happy for you!!!!!!!

 **spooky jim:** also y'all how is it already spring semester i dont understand it like we started this group chat almost a year ago

 **beebo:** correction

 **beebo** : almost a year ago i started the group chat because i needed a pencil bc i showed up to my spanish exam without one like an asshole would come and give me one

 **beebo:** and then tyler told me to ask the cute pink haired boi for one

 **spooky jim:** tyler just told me to tell you to "shut the heck up"

 **beebo:** awh he's so cute when he's embarrassed

 **beebo:** right josh

 **spooky jim:** i cant read all of a sudden i dont know

 **gerald:** tell tyler to stop being  drama queen and interact with us again we miss him

 **beebo:** anyways

 **beebo:** pete PLEASE TELL ME YOU'RE IN ANOTHER PHILOSOPHY CLASS THIS SEMESTER I MISS YOUR UPDATES

 **emo wentz:**  no, sorry to disappoint

 **emo wentz:** n e v e r  a g a i n

 **patty:** we're taking french together at night

 **emo wentz:** liste n patrick's french accent is SO FUCKING GOOD and mine is shit

 **patty:** it's true

 **frnk:** bren and i are in a 9:00 am political science class and our professor has an accent and we cant understand a damn W O R D that he says

 **spooky jim:** ooooooo where's he from

 **beebo:** he wont tell us :(

 **gerald:** guys......... how long has it been tyler was fully in this groupchat

 **beebo:** we're on day like 200

 **emo wentz:** damn this groupchat is D R Y without any new content

 **emo wentz:** i miss that boi and his """"straightness"""""

 **patty:** idk man i think he might be telling the truth when he says he's straight

 **emo wentz:** ahuh... ok patty

 **emo wentz:** you sweet innocent babe

 **patty:** shut the fuck up peter

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> my twitter is GOLNGTOOFAST and my tumblr is sweartolisten. hmu if you wanna chat. leave a comment? aye.

**Works inspired by this one:**

  * [GOOD PEOPLE NOW(?)](https://archiveofourown.org/works/11753079) by [orphan_account](https://archiveofourown.org/users/orphan_account/pseuds/orphan_account)




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